On Living

You pathetic souls! Why do you live as though you are peeping, like some sex-starved voyeur, into your own lives? You fear defeat, rejection, ostracism, “failure”, pain, fear, fatigue and weakness, and so refuse to entice them. But, I say to you, live your life by plunging recklessly towards an irrational death, and every time you emerge alive – and what care if you do not – you will laugh the kind of laugh that few people have the good fortune to know. And then go again.

I reject your primitive morality, your herd routine, your caution, your quickness to anger and quickness to delight, your cheap thrills and all else behind which you hide from the world. Yes, the word is bleak in some ways, but there is absolute beauty in much of it. Not the mawkish rubbish of “beautiful sunsets”, and “breathtaking landscapes”, but the beauty known in the freedom to dance about in a sleeping world.

Have you ever awoken at night, and thought to walk for no reason other than the compulsion to do so? If you have done that, you will know how different the world looks at night, than at day. You can piss in the street and nobody will know; shout obscenities, and hear only snoring and silence in response; cycle in the middle of the road, with near-impunity. Have you ever insulted a person who does not speak your language? Ever changed your name in a new town simply because you could, and nobody would know? Performed on a theatre stage, to empty seats? Glorious feelings, they are. The same is felt by living in a sleeping world. Only the waking will have any fun, and the sleeping cannot stop them. I have awoken now.

Life has the purpose you have decided to give it. Rape the earth of its resources, for your own comfort – nobody will notice, for they are all asleep. This is decadence. Sell your soul to the lowest bidder. Run once a week until you are out of breath and about to faint; the feeling of conquest over your own weaknesses is incredible. Spend your money as you make it. Ask her out, get rejected, and move on. Gamble, lose a million £ and laugh at the irony. Live quite simply for the sake of living.

Sleep late, wake early, for the world is passing you by when you sleep. Live for the feeling, and the sheer sake of it. If you hate your life, it is YOUR fault, for your life is what you make of it. When depression knocks at the door, give it the finger, and force yourself to believe it does not exist, and you will believe it. No feeling exists that you don’t entertain. This is what Giliwoo says on Living.

On Sleep

O! How pathetic are those who wake after 10 a.m! Do you not realise that sleep is for the hopeless, the dead and the dying? Six hours at night are all you need. DO NOT LIE IN once you have opened your eyes. The rest you get is worthless, the day is wasted, and you wake with a heavy heart and eyelids. No. Instead, the instant you are conscious of waking, arise with the immediate urgency of one who has farted in his bed, and shower straight away, for when you alight from the shower, you will have forgotten that you ever desired sleep. Worry about sleep when it comes. When you are tired, take an hour long nap. We find this is better than a lengthy sleep in the morning, and waking after 10. Drink coffee. Drink Red Bull. It would take 180 cups of either, at once, to kill you, so **** the health freaks who tell you otherwise. Life is no fun when one has heavy eyes. When you have recently achieved a great victory, you must sleep for a day (but no more). Nobody except heroes deserve such sleep. Earn your sleep. This is what Giliwoo says about sleep.

On Food

It is not wrong to eat meat, but it is good to eat vegetables. The pig wants to be eaten. Drink plenty of beer, and water too. Never get too drunk to dance. Spend obscene amounts on your food, if you spend your money on nothing else. If you are going to throw away your money, throw it in your stomach. Eat rich food: Giliwoo would sooner die a delicious death, than die at 100 years of age, never having eaten chocolate. This is what is said on food.

On the state of The Planet

Buy the biggest damn gas guzzling monster you can afford. The Planet is already gone, let’s give it a splendid farewell party. Our children will clean up the mess. They will find away, no doubt with better learning, better technology, and more perspective than we have. However, never pollute for the sake of it, or out of laziness or negligence. This is what must be said of the planet.

On Plans

Plan only for your own comfort (if that your own comfort includes the comfort of others, then so be it). Make no plans to please others, save those from whom you derive pleasure from pleasing. Make no commitments you cannot keep. They are vexations to the spirit, and dishonest acts of cowardice. But, alas, the most well-wought plans are vulnerable to the vagaries of Fate. For want of a nail, a shoe was lost. For want of a shoe, a horse was lost. For want of a horse, a rider was lost. For want of a rider, a message was lost. For want of a message, a battle was lost. For want of a battle, a kingdom was lost. A kingdom was lost for want of a nail. Make your plans of knotted ropes, not fine exquisite harness; when the harness breaks, it is no more good; when the rope breaks, you can tie a knot. Do not plan, therefore, ten thousand years in advance, but plan with knotted ropes. This is what Giliwoo says of plans.

On Confidence

Oh what pitiful wails torture our ears! They that say “I am not very confident…I have low self-esteem…I’m shy…” WE ALL ARE! Yet confidence is a self-fulfilling prophecy: prophesy that you are confident, act to make the prophecy true, and it will start to grow on you. Confidence, I tell you, comes not from knowledge of yourself, but from a knowledge of other people. If you know that all other people are as scared as you are, you will start to overcome your own fear of them. Accord people exactly as much respect as you accord yourself – no more, no less. Confident people act on the assumption that all is well with the world. And if not, then it is not the end of it. They see in others, only themselves. This is the way of confidence.

On Solutions to Problems

There are five solutions to problems: A miracle, paying them to go away, removing yourself from the source, ignoring them, or changing the way you perceive them. A man was chased by a tiger and fells over a cliff. To break his fall he caught hold of a small shrub growing on the cliff face, and hung between life and death, the prowling tiger above him, and looking down he sees a jagged rocky surface and another tiger at the bottom of the cliff. Two small mice are gnawing away at the stem of the shrub on which his life depends. Simultaneously he sees some wild strawberries growing just within reach, plucks them and pops them into his mouth and thinks to himself, 'Ah how sweet these strawberries taste!’ We are reminded also of a famous explorer who simply cut of his frost bitten toes and continued on his way. This is what Giliwoo says about problems.

On Serious Problems

Most serious problems are not serious. In the end, you will die and forget that the problem ever existed. Serious problems are those that will affect your happiness in 10 years time. If a problem affects you for only a day, it is not serious. If for only a week, it is not serious, if it will affect you in a month, it is not serious, if it will be gone in a year, it is moderate. Serious problems are resolved by confronting the source with gritted teeth and Iron will. Serious problems are like the famed Gordian Knot that none could unravel, which Alexander the Great simply cut with his sword. Philosophers will spend much time attempting to unravel them, while The Waking Man will simply hack at it with his sword. The most direct solution to a problem is the most effective. Don’t show your working, just do it. Giliwoo has spoken

On Fear

Of the 36 ways to avoid disaster, running away is sometimes best. There is no shame in this. Foolish people who are courageous in impossible situations, for that is just vanity, not “courage”. More courage is seen in one who is so confident of his actions that he retreats to fight another day, caring not how the world judges him. But courage is not to be mocked. Courage is not the absence of fear, but the belief that some things are more important than fear. Yet fear is caused by disinclination to experience pain, loss or discomfort. What about this: cut of the cause of your pain, or accept it until you no longer notice it? Fear is solved by three ways: knowledge, acceptance or resignation. This is what Giliwoo says of fear.

On Knowledge

Knowledge has four purposes: to teach how to live gloriously, to win arguments, to expand one’s experience of the world, and to possess it for the utter sake of possessing it. Gather knowledge for the simple sake of it, and all the other purposes will follow. Reading is one way to knowledge. DO NOT COUNT THE PAGES OF THICK BOOKS. Just sit down, and read each one at a time; do not get up until the book is finished, and have a nap at the end of it. This is what Giliwoo says about Knowledge.

On Work

Work is to be done as soon as it is given. Whatever earns you your livelihood, do it as though your Higher Self were judging you and saying “Now, you would detest this work in another, so too you earn my contempt got the same in you”. The Buddha he say, “work like you don’t need the money”. Never work in a job that makes you cry, makes you feel bad about yourself, makes you angry in the morning, sad in the evening, keeps you working so long, that you cannot spend your money. Finally, unless your sustenance comes from it, never stay in a job that your heart is not in. This is our judgement on work.

On Emotions

Only the emotions you acknowledge, exist. What are people but empty spaces: living, breathing, dancing pieces of crap. They are not beautiful and unique snowflakes, but pieces of organic matter with attitude. Well, Giliwoo dances on the compost heap. There is no way a carbon based piece of meat – of decaying organic matter – will hold sway over Giliwoo’s emotions. We abjure quickness to anger, and quickness to delight at frivolities. Emotions, I tell you, are nothing more than physiological responses. So is the need to use the toilet, but we usually control this. If you can control this you can control your emotions too. This is the teaching on emotions.

On Friends

Have three close friends, and no more. In addition, have a wide society of acquaintances, with whom you are on good terms. Be a friend to any who needs one, and expect nothing in return. But attach yourself only to three good friends or less: no more. Giliwoo thinks this of friendship.

On Enemies

Make their lives hell. Do not forgive the most evil ones – forgiveness is for the weak; those who are not strong enough to carry the burden of hate. Hate is not anger. Anger is cancer to the soul. Hate sustains principles. For those who express genuine remorse, forgive them instantly, but keep a civil distance from them from then on. NEVER ignore or decline a genuine apology. For another to humble themselves before you is an act of immense courage. Reward it with the courage to swallow your pride. This is the teaching on enemies.

On Love

Love is the one great feeling you can experience without any great knowledge, or fortune. Love deeply, and genuinely. Never love out of pity, or out of curiosity, or out of lust. Love only because of a kindred spirit. Never form a relationship with somebody you’ve only met online, or one whose looks attracted you first. It burns out like a contained explosion. Only go for her/him if she/he makes you laugh, or has made you laugh or think. For when two people laugh at something, they share a perspective on life. Only, and only if this happens should you pursue things further. This is what we say on love.

On Morality

When your neighbour’s house is on fire, and you have a hose, lend it to him. Never assume that somebody else will do it. Do not side with the mighty against the weak. This is the only morality there is.

On Meaning

If you see the Buddha, Kill him. This is all we say on meaning.

May you see the meaning in the painting.
Giliwoo